Growing up I got made fun of a lot. I didn't fit in anywhere during school. Hell, I still feel that way sometimes, but I can deal with it now. Back then, it sucked, I felt sad all the time, and scared of what others thought of me. I wasn't happy, and I was self conscious. People picked on me for numerous things, weight, being different, being in band, writing poetry. You name it, I probably got made fun of for it.
This continued for years. Honestly, when I graduated, I held a lot of ill feelings towards a lot of my classmates. In English class, senior year, we all wrote graduation speeches for a contest. The last line of my speech was “The best revenge is bettering yourself”. I moved onto college, and still, there was that signature “getting made fun of for being different” thing again. Still in my angst-filled rage from high school, I usually threw the middle finger up and told them all to F*** Off.
Years later, the anger dissolved. I probably wouldn't have this happiness if it weren't for starting Aikido. It sounds so cliché, but when you're working at something that improves yourself... all poisonous hatred is wiped from your system.
Probably about two or three months ago, I woke up and went to work just like I normally do. Though I had a revelation that morning. “I'm not worried about what others think of me... I haven't thought negative thoughts about myself.” Hey, even putting my hair up in the morning, I looked in the mirror and thought “Daaang. I look gorgeous today!”
I've found myself less interested in material things, and more about friendships with people, and learning more. Honestly... I'm amazed, and thankful for the changes in my life currently. It feels like everything has fallen into place, and I'm so happy for that.
Iron is full of impurities that weaken it; through forging, it becomes steel and is transformed into a razor-sharp sword. Human beings develop in the same fashion – O'Sensei
This continued for years. Honestly, when I graduated, I held a lot of ill feelings towards a lot of my classmates. In English class, senior year, we all wrote graduation speeches for a contest. The last line of my speech was “The best revenge is bettering yourself”. I moved onto college, and still, there was that signature “getting made fun of for being different” thing again. Still in my angst-filled rage from high school, I usually threw the middle finger up and told them all to F*** Off.
Years later, the anger dissolved. I probably wouldn't have this happiness if it weren't for starting Aikido. It sounds so cliché, but when you're working at something that improves yourself... all poisonous hatred is wiped from your system.
Probably about two or three months ago, I woke up and went to work just like I normally do. Though I had a revelation that morning. “I'm not worried about what others think of me... I haven't thought negative thoughts about myself.” Hey, even putting my hair up in the morning, I looked in the mirror and thought “Daaang. I look gorgeous today!”
I've found myself less interested in material things, and more about friendships with people, and learning more. Honestly... I'm amazed, and thankful for the changes in my life currently. It feels like everything has fallen into place, and I'm so happy for that.
Iron is full of impurities that weaken it; through forging, it becomes steel and is transformed into a razor-sharp sword. Human beings develop in the same fashion – O'Sensei